My Chuncky Monkey... Miss Audrey...

Who could resist a face like that?  Miss Audrey is such a sweet little baby girl!  She is getting ready to walk... you can see it on her face that she is wanting to, but is a little scared.  Audrey is not a good sleeper-- this little monkey likes to be held all night long!  Yes, I know that I am the reason behind this... I truly lose more sleep worrying that she might not be breathing than I do when I am in the recliner holding her! 
Audrey is a Mommy's girl... this is much different than Alivia, who from the moment that she saw her daddy, she was his! 

Thankfully, I have a little girl who wants mommy and everyone says she looks like me too!  She is precious... I know I am a little biased, but well, this is my blog and I guess I can pretty much say what I want:)  She is starting to give "kiss kiss"- sweet slobber all over my face!  Nothing like a "kiss kiss" first thing in the morning... Isn't that what life is truly about?  I am such a lucky mom!
Love you sweet Audie, mommy

Alivia and Elmo...

We took Alivia to see Elmo Live again!  She didn't like it as much as the first time... I think it was because we weren't as close to the stage and the fact that Elmo was not on stage the whole time!  What was that red monster thinking!!??!!  LOL!

We had a fun time at the show and then off to Zio's to eat with Lindsey, Mac, and their boys!  Although we hated not having Audrey with us, it was nice for Alivia to have our undivided attention.  She loves her sister, but I think at times she gets a little jealous of the focus that is given to a baby.  She doesn't understand that Audrey really is helpless at this point and now that Alivia is becoming a big girl, she is getting more independent. 

She is growing up to be such a little "superstar!"  She wore this tutu that Uncle Ron and Aunt Vicki gave her for Christmas, with her Elmo t-shirt, her snow boots and her hair in piggy's with a bow head band!  She informed me that she was a fashion diva!!!  Well, how do you argue with that?!? She also had her "black" sunglasses, which are huge Paris Hilton like glasses:)  She looked adorable!  We are so very luckyhave this bright star in our lives!!     Love you- Moon!                       

A Letter To Alivia and Audrey...

Alivia and Audrey,
I looked at you this morning and knew without a doubt that your two of the most precious people on earth!  I can not imagine mine or your daddy's life without you two- you two are what makes our family work.  I could not love anyone with more intensity and passion than I do you both and your daddy. 
Alivia, you are such a funny and witty little girl!  I know that all mothers look at their kids and say "you're the most beautiful," or "you're the smartest little girl..."-- But, you truly are the most beautiful and smartest little girl I know.  You amaze me with your vocabulary and how you can listen to something just once and remember it a month later.  You know all your ABC's and can sing a dozen different songs- You love to play and to be "in charge!" You have a little bit of an attitude these days, but I can see that you are going to be independent and able to problem solve.  You are spreading your little two and half year old wings and I am honored that you are my daughter... my first little being.  You make me want to be a better person and you make me want to challenge myself to do more... be more... more for you and your sister.   You make me so happy!
Audrey, you are mommy's little snuggle bunny.  Your smile just makes my heart melt and when you reach up and touch my face or look at me with that knowing "you are my mommy" look... well, that just does me in!  You are ready to walk, although you are a little scared of it.  Alivia is your true hero!  She walks into a room and you light up!  She loves you... never let her tell you differently!  I can not get enough of you... you are so beautiful and such a loving little creature.  Your first birthday is in two weeks and I can't believe that you have been mine for almost a full year.  You brighten our days and make us truly a complete family.
Girls- you are so blessed to have your daddy... he adores you both and is the perfect daddy for you.  He is so patient and willing to play and just takes such good care of us as a family.
I am so very proud to be your mommy and I love you guys so very much.... I look forward to the upcoming years with you both.  Thank you for being my daughters... I am honored, truly honored to call you mine.
Yours,  Mommy:)

The Stay At Home Mom...

I am so jealous of the stay at home moms!  I would love to be able to stay home and be the person who is shaping the personalities of my little girls.  Honestly, throughout the week, the person who keeps them during the day gets to see my daughters more waking hours than I do.  By the time I get home and get them fed and bathed, it is time for them to go to bed and time for me to try and breathe!
I think summer vacation is the reason that I have stayed in education despite the fact that we make little to no money and the entire system is falling on its rear.  Summer Vacation is the time when I get to stay home and pretend to be a stay at home mom...those two months in which I get to be with my babies day in and day out. 
I am insanely nervous about taking them to new daycare tomorrow!  I know that this is a good decision, but I am a nervous mom who doesn't like change!  I worry that nobody will like my little girls and will treat them poorly.... see, this is where being a stay at home mom really rocks!  If I could be with Alivia and Audrey all day then I would be able to give them the love and attention that I think they need everyday to flourish and grow as a person.  I hate depending on a "stranger" to instill the morals and values during the daylight hours Monday thru Friday! 
I keep praying that we will somehow someway be able for me to take a year off... just one year in which I stayed home and loved on my girls from morning to night...

Thank You My Sweet Friend...

I totally owe my dear sweet friend Michelle a "Thank You!" for my new blog page!! You are the best:)  I have become somewhat addicted to blogging-- I don't always make a lot of sense, but it is fun to do!  Having a cute "pink" page makes it even FUNNER!  so not a word, but using it anyway:)

Home Sweet Home...

Don't get me wrong- I love love love being with my mom and dad, but I am so glad to finally be home!  There is nothing quite like your own "stuff"... I miss my recliner and my bathtub!  It is also nice to get the girls back on their schedule. 
Unfortunatly, I am still not feeling so hot- I have this awful  cough and my chest feels like an elephant is sitting on it.  I just want to crawl in my bed and hide my head for a few days!  I don't see that happening! 

Lots Of Random Thoughts...

So, I am finally home from Parent/Teacher confrences... all I want to do is sit and hold my baby girls and they are both sound asleep!  Bummer for me! I don't think it would be the best "mommy move" for me to wake them up and love on them... guess I will have to wait until tomorrow for Livi and well, a an hour or so for Audrey!
Watching American Idol on the DVR... knowing that everyone else knows the top 12... I am refusing to read any text messages in case someone is trying to spoil my fun.  I am also waiting to hear if the Boomer boys are winning....
We are taking Alivia to see Elmo for the second time this Saturday.  I know this isn't nice, but it is something that we have used as a "if your a good girl..." it really wouldn't matter if she wasn't and I am afraid she is beginning to figure this out!
Also, we made the decision today to take the girls to new daycare after spring break.  This wasn't an easy decision for us... We loved Amber (the lady who has kept them since August 09) and I know Alivia will miss her something awful!  This decision was made in part becasue Amber is going onto bigger things and working towards her LPN certification.  We found out that Boomer Kids Club had a place for both girls starting now, so we had to make that move.  I think that this will be good for the girls-- Alivia will like going to "school" and the projects and schedule they showed us were something that I think we help my girls flourish. But... Amber, we love you and will miss you!
Audrey has been running a fever again today and I am worried about RSV-  we hear that it is going around.  I don't think it is that serious, but I worry anyway.  I think she is teething, but how do you ever really know?  I mean, seriously, how can you ever tell??
Okay... so off of here and giving my total attention to the AI~~ love love love this show!  I know I am crazy, but I could be addicted to a lot worse. 

Nourishment of the Soul

Starting today,  I plan to carve out a minimum of fifteen minutes a day of time to call my own.  Even if I have to wake early in the morning or stay up late at night to find the time. During that time, take a walk, listen to beautiful music, read a novel, or do anything that connects myself to the quietness of life. 

Is This Day Over Yet?

WOW!  Today is the day from my snotty nose hell!  I just want to go home and go to bed... I don't think that is going to happen!  I need a nap and then an attitude adjustment--

Life Is Stressful

My life is simply stressful!  I need a vacation away from myself these days... I wuold love to just pick up and run away from myself and all the worries that go along with my life.  I know that everyone is stressed, but lets face it... my blog- my problems!! 
I need to do something that is going to lower the stress level in my home-  Money seems to always be a constant theme in our lives, or should I say the lack of money!  I am searching for something that I could do to make more money and stay home more with the girls.  Honestly, I want it all... I want to be home with my babies and make enough money to be financially stable.   Any ideas?? 
I am envious of those women who breeze in and out of places with this look of "freedom" on their face... they are going for a walk, or going to have their nails done... etc...  I WANT THAT!  So, my "followers!"  (Hehe.. that sounds so Funny!) help me come up with something:) 

Life Is What Happens When Your Busy Making Plans...

I find myself saying "Man, I wish today were over!" or "I can't wait until tomorrow!" Life is continuing to happen even though I make plans for more exciting events and I am missing it! I come home and work like a maniac to get everything done so I can sit in the chair and just breathe~ I am missing out on that time with my girls.  I am missing out on precious moments that one day I will look back on and kick myself for not paying closer attention. 
I miss my babies being babies... I honestly can't remember when Alivia first walked or those funny things she would say that I promised myself I would never forget.  I haven't written anything down (which is one reason this blog is so important to me) nor have I kept up with taking pictures or videos of the girls.  One day I am going to wake up and my girls are going to be grown and out of the house... I am going to look around and wonder why I spent so much time worrying about my job and when I was going to get to bed instead of playing with my girls and spending quality time with them.  Life is passing me by and the only thing I am carrying with me is the stress of worry over stupid things. 
I am making a vow to spend some "good" time with Alivia and Audrey ...  time that we will all remember twenty years from now.